Happy Birthday TO ME

I cant believe I am turning 22!!! Time goes by so fast!! and I cant believe I am 22 with 3 kids, I dont think it will ever sink in how young we were when we started having kids lol 18,19 and 20!! I see other 20 year olds and im like wow, when i was their age, i already had 3 kids, this kid does not look like they are even close to being able to handle a kid! lol ANYWAY I cant believe I'm 22! I dont feel 22 I feel older, I dont know how old but older for sure. I skipped my 20's and am in my 30's so hopefully when I'm in my 30's i feel like im in my 20's... I will be celebrating my birthday with the kids today, pretty bummed Peter isnt here today, but I'm glad he got to talk to me through chat on skype to wish me a happy birthday! i was kind of having a meltdown because we couldnt video chat since there was a bad connection but hey I felt lucky enough to get to talk to him. :) I also opened a present my friend Kristy sent me!!! She sent me a lot of Kitchen stuff that I will definitely be needing when we move into our own place again (WHICH I HAVE SOOO BEEN THINKING ABOUT WHERE I WILL MOVE ONCE PETER COMES BACK !!!!!) and she sent a book too! I think I will definitely use that one before I move out. well duh because we still have a while to go before we move out. I'm off to bed now. I cant believe how many people forgot my birthday at midnight -_- kind of annoyed BUT at least the people that I'm important to remembered lol but really its almost 2am! i need to get to bed! :)

COMMENTS

I am such a dummy I dont know how to comment back on the comments left on the page. I know only 2 people have commented lol but i keep trying to reply and i cant :( i dont know how and im too annoyed by the internet because i cant figure it out i just give up. I write a super cool long comment and it doesnt let me comment. boo if you know how i can reply to the comments please let me know lol seriously

Bad day

having a bad day, its the first time deployment and autism have got to me this deployment. I have been going strong and haven't had a big meltdown since the day peter left (how funny today is exactly 3months) well anyway I've been doing so good keeping myself "strong" and today as I took kaitlyn to her therapy, she had a terrible melt down. It's a preschool setting therapy and she went in and wanted snack time which is at the end of her therapy or "school day" well it was circle time and circle time is something she can't tolerate, she can't sit there through out the singing and saying your name. And of course being around other kids, she had one of the worst melt downs I have ever seen, she was kicking, screaming and throwing herself and was just so upset it made me really sad. There were 4 other kids there, and one of the kids had both mom and dad there in session. He was having a little bit of a hard time I want to say that but i was so wrapped up with kaitlyn I didn't notice anyone else besides the mom that was staring at me, it didn't help that she is Asian and was staring at me like i was disgusting or like just calm your kid down already its bothering me. I hated it and it annoyed me so much. Then I glanced over as I'm trying to contain kaitlyn and saw the dad holding his son during circle time and I wished peter was there with me, even though even if peter wasn't deployed he wouldn't really ever be able to make it to her therapy sessions at that moment I wished kaitlyn didn't even have autism for me to never even wish peter was there at her therapy, I had to walk out of circle time because I started crying. It was too much for me to take in, It was embarrassing and i just ran to the bathroom, once again I wished peter was there to hold me n say everything was going to be okay. I feel like crapright now :'( I try not to complain and make the best out of our situation. I know the deployment is still present and so is autism. I just want to go hide in my bubble right now n come out once things are better. Of course I won't But still... I feel upset n angry at the world n people who don't appreciate their husbands or their children never having to suffer through this monster we are stuck with. people complain that their kid talks to much, I wish mine can talk at her age level, people complain their kid eats too much, I wish my daughter didn't have a limited diet due to her sensory problems. People are upset about their husband going away on a business trip for the weekend, I have to see mine leave on his "business trip" for seven months. I wish people would take their time to educate themselves on autism. On how staring like your disgusting is wrong. But most of all I can't wait for this nightmare to end.

posted from Bloggeroid

back again!!!!

I havent been posting so much lately, and last night i typed up a LONG LONG post and when i clicked POST it said there was an ERROR!!! i was so upset i just went to sleep.

I havent been posting so much lately because I havent really had time. I've been busy with the kids being sick, first it was Emily, then Peter and then Kaitlyn. They are a lot better now but since Kaitlyn got sick her autism has been cooky as well :( I zone out and get into my bubble.

I have also been on a search for new therapists!!! its so crazy and hard because i dont want to end up picking out a big NO NO therapist and have to go through the process of looking again and having had all that time wasted! kind of what i feel like now with her old therapists :(

Im so excited that we got to Skype with Peter earlier tonight! just in time for fathers day! it was like 11:30 or maybe a little later but it was still SUNDAY our time. it was really nice to see his face and just get to talk to him. I miss him like crazy!!! but so glad our deployment is almost 40% over!!!! well you know what? today will be 3 months since he left! I have survived 3 months with my husband across the world!!!! I cant believe how fast time flies! its like as long as his boot camp! and back then i thought 3 months was the end of the world!!!! it was just the beginning to a whole new world! our world now! that i wouldnt change for anything in the world! Well besides deployments lol

I REALLY REALLY REALLY want to start working out. I did a mini workout at home last night and it wasnt as bad as i thought it would be and i felt good while i was doing it! Peter kept laughing at me and trying to do what i was doing. but he would mostly laugh. I really need to loose weight! makes me think ive wasted the past 3 months not doing much of "me" that I had planned. But i feel motivated right now, we'll see how long i can keep it up.

Im off to bed now, Kaitlyn has therapy tomorrow morning at 9am and I have to wake up at like 7!! I cant believe I'm complaining about waking up at 7... but I am.

Fathers day!!!!!

I got to email with peter last night! Which was his fathers day!!! He also said he got a care package from me.:) how exciting it definitely made me happy!!! He said he should be able to Skype with us tonight so I'm preparing and doing my hair and make up :) I don't think last nights post got posted boo and it was super long so I guess I will write another one right now :) Happy Fathers Day!!!

First Parent Training Session

Yesterday, Wednesday, was my FIRST PARENT TRAINING SESSION! I was so excited for this and had been wanting to do it for so long!!!!! I just never thought the day would come, and since i was really hoping therapy would cover it because i mean WHY WOULDNT they right? well no, many insurances DO NOT COVER AUTISM SERVICES!!!!!! We are lucky our insurance will cover some Autism Services, and that is because Kaitlyn is enrolled in an extended program for family members with a disability, and because Dad is Active Duty. She is enrolled through the state program for therapy services for her, but parent training TEACHES YOU to be her therapist! how exciting is that right? No other provider that I have called that is covered by our insurance really provides parent training. I feel so lucky that now I have the opportunity to not only be my child's first teacher, but also one of her therapists that will help her get to where she needs to be. and of course it will also benefit my other children as well :)

Yesterday, was so exciting! I couldnt believe I was actually there going to go get services for my little girl! I decided I wanted to take all three kids, so my sitter can see how far therapy really is (this is in San Diego) and so she wouldnt think I'm just really trying to leave her with my kids for hours even though the therapy session is only an hour, it takes more than that to get to and back from the location. So I took the kids and well everything was great until it was time for me to go to the back with Kaitlyn and her therapist. Emily started crying saying she wanted to go to and wanted to go learn and play with Kaitlyn, you see if you read my other post, this wasnt Emily's first time going there, we had been there once so she can be her friends social partner and so I can see what parent training was all about and meet my friends therapist (who is now our therapist) so when we showed up yesterday, Emily kept saying "Mommy remember when we came here? Remember when i played play dough with my friend?" she didnt understand why she couldnt go to the back room with us. as I was going in I felt a little worried because I know her feelings had been hurt, and I kept thinking about it through out the session, specially when I heard someone crying out in the waiting room, later I found out it was some other little girl (also a sibling) who was fighting with my little boy, and being the bully that he is, he didnt let her get away with it.

We went over goals with Kaitlyn and what I was going to expect, how she would teach me to do everything, and she even showed me a few things to start off with! i was so excited, and I still am! for once since the diagnosis I felt like this is really going to be some of the answer and the help I have been wanting for so long! someone that can help me help her! of course I do have my friend, who has been here through out this whole journey but of course, she also has her daughter who also has autism and is a very very busy mom. I was so excited to be there and she told me that it looked like I was already on the right track, I was excited to hear that, because a lot of it has been help from my dear friend, who I wont post her name on here, she is a very private person and I havent asked if I can post her name on here yet ;) Then she also gave me so much more hope! I have always heard that Kaitlyn is really smart and is able to learn real fast, and is a child who is easy but hard to work with because she catches onto stuff quick, but when it comes to me and her doing it, it doesnt seem as fast? and all these are from professional people, not just a random person who says "Autism is a gift" "She is a special gifted child" and soooooo on.... These have been from people who have been her therapist, or have done evaluations for her, and of course my friend :) You know what for now I will call her Kay, since her name starts with a K.

There was one time during the session where Kaitlyn would look at me and say "what do you want?" and so I would ask "What do you want?" and Kaitlyn would then reply "Buzz, or Strawberry, Hero" These were all toys that were put up in a high place for her to have to request them, I thought i was doing a good job, UNTIL the therapist said, "we really are changing what parenting was all about when we were growing up, this is far more different than what we all use, this one is going to be the thoughest BUT we are going to stop asking questions, its just confusing for her at this point. Did you see how she asked what do you want? when she wanted something?" at that moment oh man i felt so dumb lol but I knew that it wasnt the first time she had explained that to a parent, so I was glad she told me and now I think about it a lot, like instead of now asking her "what do you want" I start talking about what she can possibly want, like she is looking at a toy, and I know she wants it, I just start talking about it, and hopefully I am doing it right at this point. We are going back 2 weeks from now, since next week she is on vacation. and I will do an update most likely every session. I might not, depends on how I'm feeling. She also does a lot of other therapies, (speech, occupational therapy, she will soon most likely start physical therapy, does an ABA therapy program, and will soon possibly start an in home program that is also available to do outings with us, and help me handle situations while on the go) <<<< Boy are our days super busy!!! I hope to put Emily in Pre-school SOON as well. How will i ever survive ;)

Target!!!

Target is really my new favorite store for right now! I have found so many amazing deals lately! even without coupons!!!! SERIOUSLY! They are remodeling all of our local (Eastvale, Norco and Corona) Targets into SUPER TARGETS!!! with of course grocery items!!! so they are trying to clear out other inventory to make room for the new addition to the store! I have found blankets for the kids that were originally $16.99 for $3.24, Nailpolish that was just $1.48 after coupon, ALMOST FREE hair products i think i paid about $0.75 for each hair product that i bought, household items for cheap, LOTS of food/snacks to send off to peter for really cheap! My kids are usually not allowed to eat all the processed junk food, which later i will post more about the diet we want to start very soon, and why we havent started it yet. I ALSO ALSO ALSO found REALLY cheap shoes! they were marked 75% off when other targets are STILL selling full price! I went to ALL THREE TARGETS Today and I think i might go back tomorrow to go look at some more cute summer shoes, and get some kitchen stuff i saw for cheap! woo hoo me!

So much to write about!!!!

I have so much to write about, I don't even know where to start so I will probably post a few tonight or just post a long one, we'll see. I'm really liking that I can post from my phone, I can write a little, take a break and write again later.

For all of you checking out my blog, thank you for reading.

Today was the BIG day!!! Something I've been wanting to do for so long! I finally made it into Rady Children's Hospital Autism Discovery Institute for PARENT TRAINING!!!!! I have heard so much about it from my friend, which I think I will write a post on my friend and everything she has helped me with. I met our new therapist today well I met her once a while ago when I took Emily to play with my friend's daughter during a session. I am so happy and excited because I know she will help me and teach me how to teach kaitlyn. We had a great first session, we didn't do much, but she was able to interact with kaitlyn and go over goals for her! The only thing I'm kicking myself for is not getting there soon, I was really hoping insurance would cover these services because it is therapy, but as of right now my insurance doesn't have a contract with them, so this will be all out of pocket expenses for our family. Which is going to be hard to balance out but I know this will help my daughter and our family so much!!!! I have considered doing some type of fundraising or raffle something to help pay for the services, but I haven't been able to come up with anything and its something I will look into more in the future.

Oh man we got to Skype with daddy last night, Emily was so happy and was showing her all her barbies!! And was showing off her new hair, and in the end she showed her a princess slipper, she was like "Daddy, I can't find the other shoe!" And was so sad so peter said, "just look for it, I'm sure you will find it" and so soon after we had to get off and after we did Emily went digging through all her shoes!!!!!! Oh boy, if you know our family you know the kids have a gazzilion shoes!!! And I was like "Emily, you are making a big mess baby" and her response "I have to look for them mommy, daddy told me to so I have to!" Then we got so lucky daddy skyped again in the morning and peter got to talk to him, he was so happy to see his daddy!!! He kept waving and pointing and would get upset if he couldn't see himself in the camera because he wanted to keep talking to his dad. Kaitlyn was asleep for both, so she didnt get to talk to him.

Oh man I have to, have to share this, today I went to the Exchange, and found a cute dress for .92 YES .92 cents!!!! And tax free so I definitely believed in core brands, corps prices haha. For those of you that don't know what the Exchange is, its just the store on base and core brands, corps prices is just what they have advertised. I also found AA batteries (10 pack) for $2.96!!! Who doesn't use AA batteries in their lives? :) I think I found some good deals, when I bought the batteries all I can think of was I wish I would've brought my coupons lol

Today I am also posting from my phone and my phone auto-corrects and sometimes as we all know auto-correct is embarrassing so if anything on here ever is embarrassing, it was probably my phone.

Posting from my phone!

So I didn't get a chance to write yesterday, but today I will, and I'm trying it out from my phone, let's see how well it works.

Yesterday Kaitlyn missed her ABA therapy session at the "preschool" setting. I was kind of upset because her therapist is not experienced and well I don't want her to work with kaitlyn because she is also doing training for the company or the program, I don't know its just annoying me and I made sure I spoke to the supervisor before going back. So tomorrow is her first day back after missing two days. I voiced out my concerns and if they are not met then I will be saying goodbye. They make enough money to not help my daughter out the way she needs help.


Kaitlyn has been having a few rough days but they seem to come and go. I really can't wait to get her on her on her diet that she needs to be on! I know it will help her plus it doesn't hurt at all to eat healthier. And well I need to start myself :)

Today peter called me and the phone was breaking up, so I was hoping we would just get on Skype since that's usually what happens he calls me to get on Skype n I do, well then he called back n when he called back we couldn't stay on the phone anymore, all he said was I love you and something else because the phone kept cutting off. I'm pretty sure he said ill call or try to call tomorrow. So that was pretty sucky. But hey hearing his voice is always better than not hearing anything.


Yesterday i was so upset. I even got real crazy on my Facebook n posted that whoever wasn't here the past 3 months will most likely not be around in our lives when peter gets home, and I wasn't kidding, it doesnt matter who you are, it makes me upset that no one is around when peter is gone (except of course the few people that have been and I'm ever so grateful) but I def don't want these people to decide to come around once peter gets home. Just really irritating and I'm sure a lot of people can relate, specially if your spouse is gone right now.


On a better note, today I went to Target with the girls and my sister I was so excited I found a Dodger Blue color nail polish!!! And on sale!!! So I bought it and came home and the bottle BROKE!!! I think I'm going to go back n buy another one tomorrow. I am also loving all the clearance deals they have going on at my local Target!!! They are making it into a Super Target with groceries and in order to make space they are marking down a lot of stuff!!! I have been able to buy peter care package stuff, and blankets for the kids, and just other household stuff.:) I love deals!!!! Haha

Oh oh oh I almost forgot, tomorrow I go down to San Diego to Rady's Children's Hospital to start Parent Training with kaitlyn with a new therapist!! I have met her before, a real good friend of mine (don't worry my friend I won't put you on blast) did the parent training there with her daughter and that was her therapist as well!!! So her new therapist is seriously kind of intimidating but if she can help me help my daughter I'm all for it!!! :)

SKYPE

Just got to Skype with my husband, boy was it great! We talked a lot about our Vegas weekend!!! both trying to decide where we wanted to stay! All that talk and we didnt come up with ANYTHING! I have a lot of homework to do now and I need to book soon before the rates go up! I am so glad for SKYPE! We didnt use Skype last deployment to video chat, we used AIM i think, and well SKYPE is a million times better!! The kids enjoy seeing daddy, even though they all slept through it today. Everytime I open the computer they ask to call daddy on the computer. it breaks my heart because i know he would love to see them just as much as they want to see him! He said he is doing good and is good on care packages since he just got one from his dad and 4 of mine are on the way! i cant help it sometimes, but i just want to buy him everything and send it over! lol Cant wait for him to be back home! Today we ALSO talked about my cooking, I really want to learn new recipes soon to change Kaitlyn's diet along with the rest of the family! and that means home cooked meals all day everyday! I miss cooking for Peter! and having someone actually telling me they LOVE what i make for them! the kids, well they just eat it lol and say ew, yuck, yum, all done and i want more. it makes me want to go find recipes right now and start practicing :)

Marine Corps

My husband is a Marine, he is currently deployed and oh boy has it changed our lives completely. This is our second deployment, and it just seems so much harder on me than the first one. I think maybe it has to do with the fact that last time i only had 1 child to really deal with because Kaitlyn was just a baby, but this time I have all three kids! and well all three miss their daddy so much! and of course I miss him so much too! My husband and I were just "kids" when he left for boot camp, and after that day, our lives have changed SO much! I wouldnt have it any other way! it was the best decision we made and when things get rough I always think of what our lives would have been like if he wouldve never left that night, and boy am I thankful everyday for it! It was our once in a lifetime opportunity and I'm glad he took it. Our first duty station was in Yuma, AZ and I HATED it so much! I wanted to be back in California, close to our family and friends. Now that I think of it, I really miss Yuma sometimes. I didnt appreciate it as much as i should have. maybe someday we will go back. MAYBE, i sure do not miss the heat there!

I have made a few amazing friends these past few years in the Marine Corps, and this deployment I have already made some amazing friends because of the deployment! It is the only thing that has been beter than the last deployment, well because last deployment i made NO friends.  Im looking forward to having daddy back home but in the mean time, i will post a lot about what we do to make the days go by faster, updates on how he is doing, and talk about care packages we send him!!!

Autism

Autism is in our family, sometimes I call it the "monster" because I cant bring myself to say Autism. My daughter has been diagnosed with Autism and its not an easy thing to accept. I can't accept it, I cant accept my daughter being stuck with the "monster." We have been doing a few therapies the past 9months and we have seen results but of course i will not stop until the day my daughter no longer needs therapy. Sometimes people dont know what to say when I tell them about it. Sometimes not giving an answer is the best thing you can do to someone in a situation like this. I am here to bring as much awareness as I can, our kids deserve it! I do not think a month of awareness is enough, our kids live with Autism everyday of their lives, and so do their families. It is so hard to see my baby not being able to express how she feels, not knowing how to interact with her siblings, not being able to touch certain things because the touch of something so simple, can bother her to the extreme. A lot of the times people tell me how much of a "good kid" she is because she keeps to herself, what i wouldnt give or do for her to be out in the crowd being crazy along with the other kids! Everyday is a new day, and everyday I am here to help her get through this, so one day she can be running around with all the other kids and just be happy. I know someday this day will come, but i also know it will take a LOT of hard work to get her there. Our life has changed so much, but i know one day i will look back and be thankful for all that we do have now.

My First Post

On my first post I want to introduce myself and a little background information on us. We are two young parents with three beautiful children. My life revolves around my family and I would do anything to see them happy. We have been married for almost 4yrs! My husband is a Marine and is currently deployed, so a lot of my posts will be deployment related. We also have a child with Autism. My blog will also have a lot of Autism. This is about our everyday lives and whoever wants to follow is welcomed. It is a look into our lives and what it is like to live our everyday life different to everyone elses and it is also for my husband so he read a little on how everything is going on with us back home. So here is the start to my blog and hopefully I dont forget to update it :)